Stop Touching People

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Messy Military Lawyer. Today’s public service announcement is… Stop touching people. Stop touching people.

I’ve had like five consults in the last six months where people are coming into trouble because they’re like touching people’s hair, touching people’s shoulders, touching people’s hands, touching people’s whatever – don’t touch people. The only time you get to touch somebody in a professional environment is if you look at, see a uniform infraction. Like back in the day when we had the BDU and you had the little strings everywhere, and you’re walking around with like a torch, you’re like, may I touch you? And then the person says, okay. Or they say not okay. And then you don’t. And if they say, okay, you make that tiny little correction, don’t light ’em on the fire. Whatever it is. Stop touching people. Stop touching people. It’s going to offend somebody. Don’t even. And here’s the other thing, stop sniffing people. I had like three where they’re like, this person sniffed me. What? Stop touching people. Stop sniffing people. Why do I have to say this? Messy Military Lawyer.

Jocelyn Stewart is a UCMJ court-martial attorney who specializes in defense of allegations of sexual assault for all branches of the military worldwide.

 

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